Food for Thought ...

Here's something I read sometime back .. really makes you wonder ..

“HERE IS A MAN who was born in an obscure village, the Child of a peasant woman. He worked in a carpenter shop until He was thirty, and then for three years He was an itinerant preacher. He never wrote a book… He never held an office. He never owned a home. He never had a family. He never went to college. He never put his foot inside a big city. He never traveled two hundred miles from the place where He was born. He never did one of the things that usually accompany greatness. He had no credentials but Himself. He had nothing to do with this world except the naked power of His Divine manhood. While still a young man, the tide of popular opinion turned against Him. He was turned over to His enemies. He went through the mockery of a trial. He was nailed to a Cross between two thieves. His executioners gambled for the only piece of property He had on earth while he was dying- and that His Coat. When He was dead He was taken down and laid in a borrowed grave through the pity of a friend. Such was His human life – He rises from the dead. Nineteen wide centuries have come and gone and today He is the Centerpiece of the human race and the Leader of the column of progress. I am within the mark when I say that all the armies that ever marched, and all the navies that ever were built, and all the parliaments that ever sat, and all the kings that ever reigned, put together, have not affected the life of man upon this earth as powerfully as that One Solitary Life.”

- from One Solitary Life by Dr James A Francis


Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year !!

The Winter Solstice Festival ..

It's 2 days before Christmas .. 22nd December.

And it's also a date that's very significant to the Chinese where traditionally family members gather together for dinner and also to have a very special treat - glutinous rice balls called 'Tang Yuan' meaning reunion.

Usually, family members will make the Tang Yuan together using glutinous rice powder. However with the advent of modern convenience stores, ready made Tang Yuan are available at hypermarkets or your local pasarmini - the Tang Yuan in the pic you see is made by my nieces - the Tang Yuan is then boiled in water with some brown sugar and pandan leaves before it's consumed ( tasted pretty good ! ).

I've gotta admit that I've never actually joined in family dinners where the Winter Solstice Festivals are concerned - but faced with the prospect of never actually having another bowl of Tang Yuan ..

My test results are finally in .. Doc says my mitral valve is faulty .. and it needs to be replaced .. so it's definitely open heart surgery .. now it's only a matter of whether I can have the surgery .. cos I've got a condition known as 'Global Hypokinesia' .. which means I've got a very very weak heart ( it's not pumping properly ) .. so more tests need to be done to see if im fit enough for surgery .. now im scheduled for an angiogram at the end of January 2010 cos they wanna see if there are any blockages ....


PS : To the anonymous bro who's been leaving comments and words of encouragements .. thanks for the articles dude .. but unfortunately i'm really sick otherwise i wouldn't even bother to go see the doc .. i'm just glad that the meds i'm on right now are keeping me healthy .. hopefully I can get thru this ....

Christmas Week ..

It's 0400am and I still cant sleep.

It's been like this for some time actually ... since I've been home on compulsory medical leave due to this condition I have.

Without anywhere to go ( not like I can go anywhere ) and not being well enough to do anything in particular, my days are spent basically online .. watching TV .. and sleeping.

I also just realised that it's gonna be Christmas next week ... on Friday, to be exact.

They say Christmas is a time for forgiveness .. and also for miracles. Well, if there are miracles to be handed out .. let me know where I need to queue. Cos I REALLY REALLY need a miracle just right about now ....

Bad news ...

It's been almost one and a half months since I've been diagnosed with a faulty valve in my heart ( well, 90 percent positively diagnosed anyways ) .. and I've been kinda trying to deal with how to tell friends and relatives ..

Most of the time people would ask as to why im at home on a working day .. and when I tell them the reason .. the reactions are not what I would have expected.

Friends whom I expected to be around or visit more often would actually 'vanish' on hearing the news ( no calls and no visits ) .. despite practically being around everyday before when I was ok .. but there are friends who on hearing the news would wanna drop by to visit even though it's out of the way ( and when I say out of the way, I do mean out of the way .. as in Johor or Ipoh ).

Anyways .. my appointment for the final test to confirm whether I need open heart surgery .. to transplant the valve in my heart is on this Thursday at 0900am. Hopefully, all I have is just something that medicine can take care of ...

Looking Ahead ...

It's really difficult to imagine a future .. my future, after all this bad news I've received.

I guess my appointment was moved up from March 2010 not cos I was convincing .. but because my situation was pretty serious .. the echocardiogram test last week only confirmed the doctor's suspicions - Doc then referred me to a heart specialist ... or as they call it .. a cardiologist.

And so I found myself in Hospital Serdang yesterday for my appointment with the cardiologist .. only to receive even worse news.


Sigh.

Apparently the cardiologist says I don't have a problem with blockages .. he says all the tests show that one of the valves in my heart is malfunctioning .. requiring a valve replacement.

Which means .. open heart surgery.

How can such a thing happen? Is it because of the types of food I've been eating .. or all the alcohol that I've been downing before? Or it is caused by all those years of puffing away on cigarettes?

Doc says it's not specifically due to anything in particular .. more likely it's just so likely that the valve malfunctioned. Perhaps it's degenerative, he says.

But there are still more tests to be done before a final diagnosis can be made .. so I guess I can hold on to that final bit of hope that I won't have to consent to a major surgery.

I just have to get through this week .. and the next before my appointment for my next test. Doesn't really help that I feel really bad from the meds I've been taking .. not to mention trying to keep an optimistic look on things.

I know there is a chance for recovery ..... but at the moment, with all this bad news .. it's just not that easy to believe it.